Becoming a Butterfly
My daughter holding a super cool butterfly at the Butterfly Biosphere at Thanksgiving Point, February 2020.
How do you become something new?
Maybe you are hoping for a radical career transformation. Or maybe you are just looking to make some small shifts in your identity, like becoming a “morning person” or a “creative.” Whatever it may be, the process of self-development can be challenging.
Becoming a “career woman” felt extremely against-the-grain of the expectations of my community and how I was raised, but it was what I needed to become to better support my family. I had to be honest with myself about my skills and the things that energized me. For me, that meant embracing a career as a creative leader, and making that shift allowed me to become the energetic and enthusiastic version of myself that my family deserves.
The Messy Middle
A display at the Arizona Science Center once explained the process of what goes on inside a cocoon as the creature turning itself into a mushy “caterpillar soup” before completely rebuilding itself. The process of becoming something new, and becoming our own versions of a “butterfly,” can also require some radical transformation, and that messy middle phase of the process might make you feel like “caterpillar soup.”
How do you make it through that tough transformation phase?
Get Inspired by Role Models
The first step to becoming something new is to have a clear picture of what you want to become. Do some research. Find other humans who are doing what you want to do, or at least a piece of it. What is it about that person you are hoping to emulate?
This is NOT about creating a beautiful mask of the picture-perfect human that you think you should be (and beat yourself up about not being.) This is about giving voice to the parts of yourself that already exist: making the map of your particular type of butterfly that already exists in your DNA, and that just needs the courage to come into being.
So What do You Really Want?
I once broke down in a therapy session with grief over not being Taylor Swift. Which is actually pretty silly. Once I gave myself space to feel and process that emotion, I got curious and asked myself, “What is it about Taylor Swift that I want to emulate?”
There were a lot of things about her life that I actually did NOT want to trade places for, but I realized that what I was longing for was the power that she has to create.
Taylor Swift has been able to write her own songs, direct her own music videos, and make her creative visions come to life. I wanted more of THAT in my life. She has also built an audience of people who care about what she has to share.
I started asking "How could I start to build and achieve some of those things? How could I make more room for creativity in my life? Maybe not at the same level, but in my own sphere of influence?" Figure out who you want to emulate, and then get specific about WHAT it is about them you would want to develop in your life, and WHY.
Design Your Dream Career
Need help designing your dream career? Check out my Creative Career Clarity program! https://www.jessdansie.com/creative-career-clarity I would love to help you discover what you need to succeed on your career path, and to watch you grow and develop into the version of yourself that you are most proud of.
